EQ Ritual #4 in the 7-Way to Be 1% Happier Together
Raising creative kids in today’s world isn’t about providing more toys or stimulating games.
It’s about creating space — for nothing, for wondering, for trying — and staying close while they figure out what to do with it.
But space is hard.
Especially when the world rewards constant stimulation and productivity.
We often think boredom is something to fix — but what if it’s just a challenge to grow through?
What if it’s where creativity is waiting?
🛠️ Story: A Tire, Some Shells, and the Future We Dreamed Of
— From the Voice of a Father Who Was Once a Restless Boy
I wasn’t always this patient.
As a boy, I was restless. Curious. Loud at the wrong times. Quiet at the wrong moments.
I was told to toughen up, to obey, to not make more mess than there already was.
And like many boys of my generation, I knew how to suppress my feelings well before I knew how to put them to good use.
Fast-forward to fatherhood — and it’s the sharpest mirror I’ve ever looked into.
Because when you raise a child, you don’t just guide them — they reflect you.
Your patterns. Your pace. Your stories. Your shadows.
So when we needed an umbrella base, it could’ve been just a task.
Click “buy.” Wait two days. Done.
But instead, I saw a different opportunity.
You’ve heard the joke: dads buy toy cars for their kids — so they can pretend to be rally drivers again?
Yeah, I do that too.
But here’s another kind of “role play”: the builder, the maker, the problem-solver — all the versions of myself I never saw growing up, but now get to show my son.
That’s the beauty of being a multipotentialite — a word I wish someone had given me sooner.
I get bored fast. I switch gears often. I need to discover, explore, and finish something meaningful.
For years, I thought this trait made me seem inconsistent. Now, I realise it actually makes me resourceful.
So instead of buying that base, we got our hands dirty.
We took an old tire.
Poured in concrete.
Then, together as a family, pressed in shells — not random ones, but the ones Irina and I picked five years ago, before the world stopped.
Those shells sat on our windowsill through burnout, through lockdown.
They reminded us that joy could still live in small things.
That we were building a future — even before Rafa arrived.
And now?
They sit on our terrace, inside a handmade project.
Made not out of urgency, but out of choice.
Not for Pinterest, not for productivity.
But to teach him — and remind ourselves — that creativity doesn’t always come from inspiration.
Sometimes, it comes from need, from boredom, from being still long enough to imagine something better.
That’s what raising creative kids looks like.
It’s not just painting.
It’s remembering. It’s repairing.
It’s showing up in the roles we wish we’d seen — and finally becoming them.
What the Research Says: Boredom = Space for the Brain to Grow
Several trusted voices support what many conscious caregivers are rediscovering:
Vera F. Birkenbihl, a pioneer of brain-friendly learning, emphasized the power of pattern interruption — like silence or stillness — to activate new neural pathways and insight.
Barbara Sher, in her work on multipotentiality, showed that children with space to explore diverse interests often grow into adaptive, deeply creative adults.
The Child Mind Institute confirms that boredom invites children to invent, imagine, and engage in open-ended play — all essential for developing emotional resilience and confidence.
In summary: by allowing boredom to be present – rather than hastily seeking to banish it – we lay the emotional foundations for lasting creativity.
⏳ The Ritual: 14 Minutes of “Creative Pause” Time
This week’s EQ Ritual is about co-creating a space where something unexpected can emerge.
Set a timer. No screens. No toys with instructions. No agenda.
Just space, presence, and materials from your real life.
Ideas by Age:
Toddlers
Mix flour and water and watch what they do
Offer pots and spoons and see what becomes music
Let them explore a terrace, a drawer, or a basket of safe items
→ Tip: Narrate what you observe: “You’re figuring it out… wow, you tried something new!”
Kids (4–9)
Hand them recyclables and tape: “What can you invent?”
Invite them to “build a solution” for a real family need (shoe rack, card holder, pet toy)
Ask: “If we didn’t have light, how would we make it fun?”
→ Let them teach you what their brain can do with space
Preteens
Challenge: “What could we do for 14 minutes without anything electric?”
Journal: “If I had to solve a problem in the dark, I would…”
Co-create: Record your own family “invention guide” — what you made from boredom
The Blackout, the Stars, and the Creative Choice to See Differently
A few days ago, we experienced an 11-hour blackout.
No lights. No distractions. No plans.
But instead of rushing for a flashlight or defaulting to stress, we made a different choice: to enter the moment with our son — curiously, creatively, together.
We walked outside in the complete darkness.
We held his hands and let him feel the rhythm of our steps.
We looked up at the stars — so vivid without the city glow.
We listened to night sounds. Talked to neighbours. Observed.
We helped him feel safe in uncertainty.
We invited him to notice what’s usually hidden by noise.
Some people thought we needed help.
But this was the help — this was the lesson.
Creativity, presence, and resilience don’t appear in ease.
They’re forged in moments we can’t predict.
And when we practice that together — it becomes who we are.
The Night Sky and What We Carry With Us
This wasn’t the first time we found beauty in the dark.
Eight years ago, while in Bali for Nyepi — the Day of Silence — we experienced a night without light, noise, or distraction.
No screens, no cars, no streetlamps.
Just stillness.
And the clearest sky we’d ever seen — the Milky Way painting itself across the silence.
That memory came rushing back as we walked in the dark with our son.
The stars weren’t as vivid in Portugal. But we remembered.
What we gave our son that night wasn’t just safety.
It was a continuation of a practice.
A lineage of wonder.
A chance to connect in uncertainty — and see it as possibility.
Creating Space, Not Just Solutions
Creativity is often quiet.
It doesn’t shout. It waits — for a gap in the noise.
And when we, as caregivers, model that gap — when we stop scrolling, when we resist the urge to entertain or fill the silence — our children see it’s okay to pause.
This is EQ Ritual #4 in the 7-Way to Be 1% Happier Together.
Not a how-to, but a way back — to resourcefulness, to curiosity, to co-creation.
And next week, we’ll explore what comes after boredom…
when time disappears, presence deepens, and you and your child enter flow.
Until then — create some space.
And see what wants to grow.
